The stereotype of the hung black man, with the super penis, is only surpased by the one where he is considered an oversexed animal. Oversexed is another way of saying that he is a sexual machine with super sexual powers, who can satisfy numerous women. Numerous women at the same time. Or one woman numerous times. For sure there is similar stereotypes of the over sexed black woman, but if we ignore the behaviours of a few black women misbehaving, black women have not as willing to embraced this negative sexual stereotype, like black men do, in an age of rampant STD’s, rampant cheating and extra marital misbehaviours. The stereotype is negative, because as it grows to be a self fulfilling one, often times the image of the black man is magnified to the point where women of other ethnic groups either desires or seek out a black man, to satisfy their sexual fantasies. Or run screaming the other way out of fear of such a Frankenstein type of sexual beast. It’s negative because males who shouldn’t even be talking smack about their sexual proclivities, size or skills, feels it is necessary to bore or disgust other men, much less, unsuspecting women, with their churlish behaviours.
Blackmen do themselves a disservice by embracing, promoting and passing on these stereotype to their sons, other impressionable youth or other people they think they are impressing. Overstand that with great power or position or even stereotype, comes great responsibility. The man who embrace the stereotype of the kneegrow with his “spear” always ready and willing to use, will be forced to uphold his end of the stereotype by performing in a way comperable or surpassing that of the stereotype. this comes with a lot of pressure for many who are not about that life. The pressure required to fulfil this stereotype is enormous and many have embarrassed themselves repeatedly in private or publicly. Some have gone so far down the rabbit hole of their own self importance and sense of entitlement to a woman’s body or emotions, they end up molesting different females from as young as toddlers to as old as grandmothers. The latter, molestations and rapes are manifestations of the embracing of a negative stereotype as positive, and then augmenting the behaviour with the addictiveness of pornography and illicit drugs. Overstand that most men do not rape or molest, even though there is a rise in society in general, of molestation of children and women. However, we have never, as Afurakan men, been so enamoured by our penis and sexual proclivity being our best characteristics, before the sex farms of the great perversion.
Follow me so far?
Many black males feel that their sexual power, skills or size is the only ability of worth they have in order to feel valued in a world that show them no value. The only empowering resource or feature they have, that the white man can’t readily take away from them. Of course they miss the many lynched black men, with their penis and testicles cut off and stuffed in their mouth or pickled and placed in a jar. This misplaced value was beaten into them on the slave plantations and the accompanying sense of powerlessness is reinforced in the church and at home by fearful or ignorant parents. Thus any knowledge of their sense of worth is taught to them primerely in the streets among pimps, hustlers, prostitutes and con artists. It is only the stereotype of his primal sexual urges and the sex circus surrounding it, that has left the pimp environment and been embraced by and becoming acceptable in all parts of social strata of modern society. This false sense of power, has been transferred from lands, property and resources and placed onto the loins of the powerless black male. Due to the embracing of this misplaced “power”, the black male is now forced into a corner of no escape. He has to prove to his homies, his girl and random woman and most importantly, himself, that he can speak loudly and carry a big dick.. er…stick!
Misery, like self fulfilling stereotypes, do not sit at home wallowing in their own self pity. Not often anyway. No! They take to the streets looking for companions or begging to be noticed. Hence the reasons why so many black males put such a high value on their ability to copulate like porn stars, or rutting dogs (if you like that metaphor) instead of on their ability to positively relate to a woman as a man of virtue, high moral standards with authentic values. While nothing says one cannot be a man of strong values and morals, while also be a “bedroom bully”, many take the easy way out and just focus on being able to be a sexual circus performer only.
For men in a committed relationship with one woman, the loss of libido (sex drive) is a common problem that affects many at some point in their life. It’s often linked to relationship issues, stress or tiredness, but can be a sign of an underlying medical problem, such as reduced hormone levels. Sex is a topic that many people want to talk about — but few want to acknowledge if it becomes a problem. Many face challenges in what is often the first step in sexual intimacy, which is sexual desire or sex drive. Men with low sex drive have reduced sexual interest and few sexual fantasies or thoughts. If you experience this, you may not want to have sex with your partner or return your partner’s advances. As a result, you can’t be an active partner in sexual intimacy, as much as you might try. Low sex drive impacts both people in a relationship. You may feel anxious because you want to increase your sex drive. But at the same time, you don’t feel the emotions or physical longing. While you care for your partner, you may find yourself unable to fulfill the sexual part of the relationship.
Low sex drive can also affect your woman in an a very emotion laden way. They may see themselves as undesirable and lacking sexual fulfillment. This can lead to in relationship difficulties. There are several steps that you and your woman can take before these difficulties set in. One option is individual or couple’s therapy. This can help improve communication within a relationship. In turn, this can strengthen sexual bonds and spark desire. You can also talk to a competent doctor. Not all doctor treat black people the same way they do others, hence the emphasis on competence. There have been many advances in research and information on conditions related to low sex drive. If you experience low sex drive, talk to your doctor. This could be your primary care physician, gynecologist, or mental health professional. Each of these experts can check you for potential underlying causes related to low sex drive. They can also recommend treatments to enhance sex drive.
There’s no reason to feel ashamed, embarrassed, or even unsure about talking to your doctor. Sexual health is tied with mental and physical health. The impacts of a strained relationship and lower quality of life can carry over into your overall health. Try not to neglect or brush aside your emotions related to sex. Talk to your woman. And by all means try to stay away from artificial sexual enhancers, such as Viagra, Calais, over the counter sex boosters or even cocaine. Yes! I know of men who put cocaine on their penis, to reduce sensation to stave of ejaculation to the detriment of the health of the nerves in the penis. Communication regarding sex and sexual health, between all couples is vital. Communication is especially important to achieve successful outcomes when treating flagging sex dries.. According to a survey from the National Women’s Health Resource Center on the impacts of low sexual desire on a relationship:
59 percent of women report that low sex drive puts a negative impact on their relationships.
85 percent of women said low sexual desire hurts intimacy levels with a partner.
66 percent of women report that low sexual desire impacts their relationship communication.
While low sex drive can impact a relationship, you can take steps to communicate better and enhance intimacy. Some suggestions include: Engaging in more foreplay or designating a night where the couple can kiss and touch. This doesn’t have to end with intercourse. Engaging in role play or new sexual positions that could stimulate more sensations for a woman.Using costumes, or lingerie — something new to change the sexual experience.
The takeaway from all of this is that your enhanced sex drive may not happen overnight, but it’s not impossible. It’s important that you and your woman commit to trying new things. Also, support each other through treatment. Together and with time, low sex drive can improve. The difference between desire and arousal is very significant and if you are concerned about “going off” sex, it is important to understand the difference between desire and arousal. Often the body will still respond to touch and caress so it’s still perfectly possible to have an active sexual relationship, but the desire to do so may be reliant on one partner to always initiate. Even with some conditions like diabetes, where a man is no longer able to get a natural erection, the desire remains. The issue is that the body does not become aroused. It’s also important to consider that in men, loss of libido isn’t the same as erectile dysfunction. An artificial drug such as Viagra will help a man to have an erection, but not give him the desire to have sex.
If you are too stressed for sex, this is a psychological causes of the kind we see regularly, which can be linked to a number of relationship issues as well as life events and the effects of stress. Such as embracing the negative stereotype I spoke of previously, even when this is not your personality. Such a dichotomy creates performance anxiety. And while the body does tend to cope well with everyday pressures and tiredness – there will be days when you don’t feel the desire to be sexual. However, prolonged loss of desire is often associated with more extreme difficulties such as a bereavement and other significant life events that are likely to have an impact on all aspects of your life, not just your sexual libido. Just plain weariness after the birth of a baby is a common and normal passion killer. Growing out of shape, fat due to the consuming of low nutritionally dense foods, also play a role in the over all health of the body.
The advice often given in magazines is that candle-lit baths and cuddles will solve many psychological problems with desire, but it has been pointed out that this advice is aimed at women and doesn’t resonate for most men. In my experience, it does tend to be women who present at counselling more regularly, saying they have “gone off sex” but over recent years there has been a significant increase of the number of men expressing the same concern. This tends to be linked to the often remarked difference between women and men – that women need to feel loved in order to want sex and men need to have sex in order to feel loved. Of course this isn’t the same for everyone, but it’s a common theme that comes up. If you are struggling with desire, while at the same time struggling with maintaining a certain image of a man that is required to be ready and willing to go, you should see your doctor first to discuss possible physical causes. Once this is ruled out, you may want to get the help of a relationship counsellor or sex therapist in order to explore underlying issues. and if that fails, you should definitely consider becoming healthy by exercising, eating healthy, mediate and developing a happy disposition. By the way, low libido and hormone imbalance goes hand in hand. And hormone imbalance is a result of your poor food intake and poor lifestyle.