Poster Alan Roger Currie of Hollywood Men’s Dating Advice column, wrote an article on Steve Harvey, after seeing this YouTube video of the ask Steve show.
You can see the full article here. However, the article and video, inspired me to write this post dedicated to the urban legend…or in hopes of dispelling the urban legend, that women and simps, like Steve Harvey who urge black males in particular to behave as the kind of men women wants them to be.
In case you may have forgotten, Steve Harvey, outside of the Kings of Comedy concert tour, was not internationally known, until he wrote the attack piece on men called: Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man is a book by Steve Harvey which describes for women Harvey’s concept of what men really think about love, relationships, intimacy and commitment.
The book is entirely predicated on the idea that men and women think essentially differently and that women must scheme (“think like a man”) to get the attention of the men they want/need. This book spawned two movies of the same name. The first movie to show examples of the various ways black men behave “badly” on the dating scene. Then it offers solutions to that kind of bad behavior, supposedly designed to change the men into people with whom these women can feel proud of being involved.
There is a child like male who won’t grow up and won’t commit to his female “friend”. In the book Steve Harvey suggests that a dating woman should force the man to “man up”, by getting rid of his tacky apartment furnishings and making him shop for grown-up furniture.
There is the mama’s boy who expects the women he’s involved with to share him with the first woman in his life — his mother. Despite the black community chastising black men about remembering that “yo mamma black” or some sniveling shit like that. Steve suggests that the woman make him choose between her and her mother.
Then there is the gash man. The “hit-it-and-quit-it type”, who stops acting romantic and starts acting like he’s on a booty call after the first time a woman had sex with him. Steve Harvey’s suggestion to all women is to put a 90-day rule before she surrenders “the cookie.” The first movie showed a black woman with a weak white man, a career woman, who looked down on a light skinned black man who was about being his own business owner. The second movie had nothing at all to do with the book except for the loose association to the book.
Think like a Man Too is an example of hollyweird’s lack of creativity especially around black subject matter— this time the plot is centered around a low-stakes battle of the sexes about which group can throw a better party. The stereotype of black men and woman…and of course the token whites, was in full effect. The wanting the same thing: a crazy bachelor /bachelorette party; a fun night with friends; a relationship that can move to the next level; a beautiful wedding for the couple that brought them there. Still never separated the way the men act or think from the way the women act or think, which means there wouldn’t be anything to pretend even if they wanted to.